There are some days when......

   There are some days when, after just a few short minutes, you know that it might be better to go back to bed and start over. No, however, this is not going to be your typical..."you know you are having a bad day when".....posting.

   After discovering that  I forgot to buy coffee on my last trip to the grocery store or forgot to press the 'wash' button on the dish washer before going to bed, I began to wonder what other surprises the day had in store for me. (There were a few old tea bags in the cupboard, but tea just doesn't have the same morning 'kick' as coffee does for me, but...sometimes you make do with what you have.)

   After a brief visual scan of the yard, I finally found the morning newspaper sitting in a puddle of water at the end of the driveway, only this time the delivery person had not put the neatly folded newspaper in a plastic wrapper and the paper was too wet to even think about spreading out to dry. Not the worse thing in the world. I can always catch the news on television.

   Speaking of television, it appears the cable service in not working this morning, so.... no TV, internet or telephone service. Is this some foreign 'rogue' country at work again and is that a mullet haircut he has ?  There is always my cell phone, which, by the way. I forgot to plug into the charger last night. But then there are some days when it might not be a bad thing to be isolated from the rest of the world for an hour or two.

   No news, no phone, no connection to the outside world! A bowl of cereal would be great. Plenty of cereal, but why is the milk a funny color and have a strange odor? Guess I had better add milk to the list along with the coffee I need to buy tomorrow.

   Sticking with breakfast cereal for a moment. I usually put my cereal in the bowl and then add the milk and it blends together quite well. Pour the milk in the bowl first and then add the cereal and it just seems to float on top. Wonder what scientific principle that is? Probably worth a national study....”Why does the cereal float on a bowl of milk?”

   It's raining pretty hard at the moment and I can't get the dog to go outside and besides, my raincoat is in the trunk of the car, which is parked, not in the garage, but in the driveway. I thought I would be smart and, knowing it was going to rain, leave the car outside and let the rain wash off some of the dirt and sand. Did I mention the temperature was 29 degrees and the car was now encased in ice? Well, at least it's nice and shiny.

   My plan was to spend a bit of time on the road today, trying to track down some of the people I hoped would participate in one of the national research studies I am working on, but with slick and icy roads, I think I'll wait until the weather clears and the ice melts. Who wants to have someone knocking on their door on a cold and rainy day? Who wants to have someone knocking on the door 'from the government' on any day? So, this might be a good time to finish up on a couple of projects around the house.

   No clean paint brushes, not enough paint and the sandpaper is pretty well worn smooth. Time to shift to plan B. Clean out the pellet stove. Plug in the vacuum, flip the switch and the room instantly fills with a cloud of black pellet dust. Even the dog runs to another room. Well, at least now I really have something to do! Where are those little blue colored dust collector thingies?

   By mid morning, I had decided that it had not been one of my most productive days, except to clean the living room, and although there had been no major or catastrophic events to slow me down, like a flat tire or the car running out of gas on the interstate or a tree falling through the roof or those other  "you know you're having a bad day events", sometimes there are just some days when it makes sense to roll over, go back to sleep for a few minutes and start over. Maybe by the time I get up the  internet and cable service will be back up and running.

   P.S. For those who thought I might post my annual list of New Year's resolutions, which by the way I very rarely ever keep, that may or may not be for a future edition. However, making sure there is a enough coffee in the house, that the milk in the refrigerator is well under the 'sell by' date and that I park the car in the garage when there is an ice storm might be a pretty good start to some simple, common, everyday resolutions. One more. Clean the paint brushes each time  after using.

                                                     Happy New Year

Of course there's a reason to celebrate............

   Christmas is just around the corner and a new year less than two weeks away now. This alone should and could be cause for celebration. But today, December 21, is a special day too. For those not sure, it is the shortest day and the longest night of the year.

   Each day I watch the weather forecast, primarily to see if I will need a raincoat or thermal underwear or maybe both. But there is one statistic that always draws my attention however....the hours of daylight and the amount of the decrease of sunlight each day since June. As of today, it's eight hours and forty seven minutes of daylight with a decrease of six hours and fifty one minutes of sun light from June. That is when the sun is actually shining. The sun is something we have not seen for many days now, making the dark and gloomy days seem to blend seamlessly into the night.

   The shortest day of the year, or the winter solstice as it is astronomically known. marks the shortest day and the longest night of the year in the northern hemisphere, while those south of the Equator enjoy basking in the sunshine and playing beach volleyball with warm sunny days and  starlit nights. Now all of this shortness and 'longness' has a scientific explanation, the tipping of the earth's axis and orbits around the sun. But that explanation is for another day.

   Winter solstice should not be confused with the first day of winter. The solstice is actually just a moment in time, like many things in life , sometime around 11:00 AM I think. And the first day of winter this year? Let's try the snowstorm of November 3!

   The winter solstice has a long history of importance. In addition to being a time of seasonal change, it was often seen as a time of warning and a reminder to communities of the coming months of possible starvation. In many of the colder locations the months of January to April were known as the 'famine' months.

   On a more positive note, many early cultures recognized the winter solstice as a time for celebration, of rebirth, of festivals and for holiday gatherings. It was also a time when much of the wine, prepared and bottled in late summer was now ready for drinking. Let's party.

   The time from mid to late November to early April is a time of early sunsets and late sunrises. Recently is seems there have been very few sunrises due to the stormy weather plaguing the Northeast. Being the hearty stock we are, we know this, too, will pass and that the sun will eventually shine again. And if not, perhaps we can contact our local legislators to submit legislation about increasing the amount of sunshine each day. Maybe the Governor could help too.

   For those really curious, the shortest day of the year does not always fall on December 21, the result of the earth's trip around the sun and other factors, but that gets too complicated for me to explain here. I'll stick with December 21.

   But now the countdown begins. With each new day it starts with only a few seconds, but soon minutes will be added to the amount of daylight. And, as if on cue, the seed catalogs will begin to arrive in the mail and Kohl's and Target will begin their swimsuit and beachwear advertisements.

   As the sun moves higher into the sky and the once lengthy shadows cast from the low winter sun begin to shrink, it will be time to start up the lawn mower, sweep the leftover sand and salt from the driveway, clean up the yard after the dog and take the car to the car wash.

   For sure, Christmas and New Years are great times to celebrate with family and friends. But let's not forget to celebrate, not the shortest day of the year, but what will soon follow, even if it's only one or two minutes each day. 

Sixty eight..........

   Sixty eight could be the year I graduated from college or the number of foul shots I missed before I made the first one in a very limited high school basketball career. It could be the number of fish I have caught (and threw back) or the year of my favorite car (Mustang). But with Christmas just a few days away, this will be my sixty eighth Christmas celebration. I don't remember too many Christmas holidays as a very young child, but as I grow older the holiday seems to take on  new meaning each year.

   Sixty eight years sounds and feels like a long time. (My knees and joints often remind me of that.) A great deal has happened in the world since 1946. There have been numerous wars, a host of famous and infamous world leaders, new and wonderful scientific discoveries, catastrophic weather and political events, all whose impacts and outcomes still not fully known or understood.

   Millions of children have been born and taken their places in the world, but millions also have died because of disease or lack of food, deaths, the result of a world that often turns a blind eye on those who are different or who others in the world may fear.

   In the last sixty eight years paper and pencils have been replaced with computers and Ipads and spell check. Telephones, once tightly fastened to walls and desktops, now slip neatly inside a pocket or purse and travel with us no matter where we go, keeping us in constant communication with the rest of the world. Who  in 1946, would have ever believed that a television show, perhaps the “I Love Lucy” reruns would be viewed on a telephone that fits in your pocket?

   Over the years family Christmas celebrations have evolved also. I grew older, went off to college, got married and with my wife,  started our own family raising three wonderful daughters. Once only parents, our parents were now grandparents and Christmas took on different meanings for them too.

   Within that sixty eight years our children grew up, went off to school, married and started families of their own. Once parents, we were now the grandparents too.

   In sixty eight years there have been a lot of Christmas trees cut down and decorated, thousands of cookies baked, eaten and given to neighbors and friends and more than a few turkeys and hams cooked for Christmas dinners. I personally like the 'left overs'.

   There have been hundreds of presents bought, wrapped and returned because they were either too big, too small or the wrong color.

   In sixty eight years I wonder how many times “Silent Night” has been sung or the birth of Jesus reenacted at the local churches. But while the world has changed dramatically over the years, the story of Jesus, which dates back long, long before 1946, remains consistent.

   This year will be my sixty eighth Christmas and I look forward to it and many more. I know that as each day passes the world becomes a different place, some parts good, other parts, I'm not so sure. But within a few days it will be Christmas Eve and despite all that's happening around the world, both the good and the bad, it is still a special time for many, including one sixty eight year old living in Maine.

   And to those around the globe who attempt to disrupt and destroy, perhaps out of fear or ignorance, on the eve of December 24^th, I encourage you to put down your guns and, for just a few minutes, be silent. Listen to the silence. Perhaps when the sun comes up the next morning, you will have a new understanding of  what “peace” can bring.

PS......To those who may be reading this, I am well aware that some of your beliefs and ideas may be different than mine. But I do believe that this diversity adds richness to life and that our hopes for the future, regardless of what you believe, are similar. Working together we can all make the world a better place.
                                                Holiday wishes to all!

Sometimes it's nice to get away, but........

   Sometimes it's nice to get away, do a bit of traveling and see other parts of the country and how others live. When that opportunity arises for me, however, it often serves more as a reality check.

   Last week I spent a few days on the West Coast. That's what the natives call it. They don't call it California. It wasn't a pleasure trip, though, so I didn't have a lot of time to see the local sights, although there were a few "local sights" moving around in LAX.

   I have been to Los Angeles before, so I was somewhat familiar with the area and where I was headed. The City of Angels? Let me think about that for a moment. I am not sure I saw too many angels.

   The trip West can often be a bear and this trip was to be one of those times. I am not sure how long the flight time normally is, especially with all the time changes and stuff, but when the airplane pilot says its going to be a bit of a bumpy ride in spots and a bit longer in time than usual, that should be a hint.

   For me, when heading west, sometimes it seems you  get there before you leave and even when you are warned the trip may take a bit longer, often that still happens and this trip was no exception. It was a long time on the plane. But the good news......even with the added flight time,  I still arrived at a reasonable hour in the late afternoon. The bad news..... they ran out of food on the plane at row 21. I was in row 29 and there were still at least 5 more  rows  behind me. Several passengers behind me were not happy, especially since they had paid for lunch in advance. Oh well! Good time to start dieting before the holiday food rush.

   The trip from the airport to the hotel can be an adventure in itself  and I have a lot a respect for those who drive the shuttles hour after hour, day after day. The traffic in Los Angeles, the City of Angels, is frightening. When we stopped it took several minutes for the lady next to me to unwrap her fingers from the seat back in front of her where she had gripped so tightly. Those were not 'angels' driving cars. Six lane highways and high rates of speed  is a far cry from the 'one traffic light' town where I live, where our local police officer  sits in the parking lot of the local grocery store, attempting to catch speeders doing 5 mph over the speed limit down Somerset Ave.

   This was a working trip, so there was not time to get out and sight see, especially as someone my age attempts to adjust to the time changes. The clock on the night stand said its only 3:30 AM, but my internal clock kept telling me its 6:30. Should I get up and go exercise in the fitness center? Are you crazy? Why would I do that? I don't even work out at the local fitness center at home! OK. Maybe I can roll over and go back to sleep for a few minutes. And that's what it was, a few minutes! The new time on the clock was now 4:10 AM.

   The hotel was only a few brief steps from the Staple Center, the home of the Lakers, the Kings, and who knows who else. The enthusiasm for sports teams and entertainment in the area is displayed everywhere.

   And food? I will bet within a stones throw of the hotel, and not including the hotel restaurants, there were 20-25 restaurants, all shape, all sizes, and cuisines.

   After three days of hard work and jammed packed training, it was time to return home.

   The nice thing about coming home from anywhere west of Maine are the tail winds. The travel time not only seems much shorter but it usually is. See what a stiff breeze from behind will do?    
   But as with life in general and a strong breeze at your back, there are always trade offs. Sixty to seventy degree temperatures would give way to twenty to thirty degrees and chances are, upon arrival, it would be dark and much later, and I was just beginning to get used to the time change. And about the snow on my car in the parking lot due to the mid-week storm? I thought the airport staff might at least have cleaned off the windshield! Silly me.

   It's been a couple of days now and I am still trying to catch up on lost sleep, jet lag, and doing the laundry. It is nice to get away every once and awhile and see how the rest of the world lives, beyond the pine trees.  
   But traveling and seeing other places also serves to remind me of the choices I  made to live where I live, far away from the large cities and metropolitan areas, away from speeding traffic and crowded highways, and the long lines of people waiting to get into the movie theaters,  to live in town with only one traffic light and a police officer who sits mostly unnoticed behind the trees in the parking lot of the local shopping area, drinking a cup of coffee, eyes peeled to catch the next speeding vehicle on Somerset Avenue.  It is nice to get away every once and a while, but it's really nice to get back home too.  

  ( Christmas at the Staples Center (Is it the tree or Christmas that is sponsored by Coke?)

                                              

Decking the halls and other festive “stuff”........

   I was going to write about the month of December, the last month of the year and share a bit of research, like... it is the first full month of the meteorological winter in the northern hemisphere and the month of December always begins on the same day of the week as September and ends on the same day of the week as April. Fascinating!

   Actually what I did find somewhat interesting was that December is Latin for the word 'decem', meaning ten and during the days of the Roman calendar, there were only ten months in a year, the first month being March and the last month being December. And those long winter days following December until March were not part of any month. Makes sense to me.

   But as I continued to research the history and events of December, I kept looking at the Christmas decorations piled up in the den and decided it was time to get to work and turn the house into a holiday wonderland....or something close to it.

   Over the years we have collected a variety of decorations and ornaments, many symbolic of family fun times and memories. A number of the ornaments on the tree each year were made by our children and grandchildren, or were purchased on different trips and vacations as mementos, cheaper than a tee shirt.

   There are still some decorations that were purchased many year ago at the local Ames Department Store. Any one remember Ames's?

   Glass, plastic, cloth or some other strange composite materials, when finished, the tree is a kaleidoscope of lights and color and represents a trip through our family history.

   And just for the record, until a few years ago we would always get a freshly cut tree from the local tree farm. Four years ago we decided to purchase an artificial tree. It was a difficult break from tradition, but it has turned out to be a lot easier and cleaner and we don't have to worry about picking out that perfect tree any more or be continually vacuuming up the needles off the floor. The artificial tree looks really nice. And about the fresh pine smell, those new plug in air fresheners make it smell almost real.

   Over the years we have managed to collect many different makes, models and sizes of Santas. Some are quite old, yes antique, and each year there seems to be at least one or two new ones added to the ever increasing collection.

   My wife has made a number of Santas, modeling them from pictures on Christmas cards and holiday post cards and coupled with the others, the store bought and the ones we have received as gifts, I would estimate there to be about 150 different styles, shapes and sizes. With artificial greens and trees, the house takes on the look of a Santa's village and workshop. Now if I can just find an elf or two to help.

   Christmas is also known as the 'holiday of lights' and both inside and out the house lights up each night with a rainbow of colors. In recent years I have been wrapping the trunks of the trees in the yard with stings of colored light. That's the back yard. That's for the benefit of the wild life that passes through our yard.

   The front yard is a bit more subdued with white candle lights in each window and, for the first time this year, a wreath on the front door that lights up. What will they think of next.

   About four hours into the holiday decorating and I have barely opened half of the Tupperware containers. Over the years I have found it safer to stash the Christmas decorations in the plastic containers. First, it keeps the squirrels and mice from eating and destroying them. Second, if I keep the containers in one central location, like my garage storage area, and write the contents on the outside of the container, it provides for a bit more organization, both putting them out for display and packing them up at the end of the season. What did we do before plastic?

   It's about two thirds done now and it's time to take a break. The fire is going in the pellet stove, the late afternoon light has given way to darkness and the eggnog is ready for a bit of reinforcement. I wonder who ever discovered that eggnog and brandy go really well together?

   But finally, with the last Santa Claus in place, the final reindeer attached to one of the many sleighs, and the few remaining little pine trees grouped together, made to look like the Northwoods of Maine, it's time to flip the switch. With the last sip of eggnog and the flip of the switch, our once 'common place' living area is instantly transformed into  a bright and colorful array of 'things' Christmas, past and present. It took some extra time this year, perhaps because of the eggnog, but this year may be the best year yet, although I probably say that every year.
    So, it's one more glass of eggnog and time to relax in front of the fire. But first, what do I do with all these empty Tupperware containers?

                                     

  Who said all Santas have to wear red!

The Myth of Self.......

   Myth: any imaginary person or thing spoken as though existing. (Webster's New World Dictionary)

   Like many others, each day I usually glance at myself in a mirror, generally right after getting up each morning. On a short term basis I look pretty much the same day after day. Maybe I need a shave or to get a trim at the barber shop, but for the most part the image I see is  much the same face, the same person I saw the day before.

   On a longer term basis, however, my appearance has changed quite drastically and perhaps my self image as well. Gray hair, what is left of it, wrinkles and skin that has aged over time due to exposure to the sun, wind, rain and to life in general has transformed a once younger looking me into someone who looks like my father or maybe even ...my grandfather. Who is that person staring back at me in the mirror?

   We all have an image of how we see our self, or want to see our self, but the reality may be that if this is truly who we believe we are, how we see our self reflected back to us in the mirror, is it only a myth, a myth based solely on appearance or is it deception? Does it really reflect the person  we are?

   I am scheduled to meet someone at the airport as we will be traveling together to a meeting. When asked what I look like, to help locate me in the airport, I described myself as tall, dark and handsome. But the face staring back at me in the morning mirror is far from that image. I chuckled... and passed the comment off as wishful thinking and a smart-xxx remark. But I can always dream.

   We all have a picture of 'self' in our mind, the person we think we are. We force and reinforce that self image and perception by how we act, how we dress, perhaps by the job we have or the car we drive. We project that image by where we live or would like to live. Perhaps it is the type or style of house we live in, the furniture we sit on or the size of the outdoor barbecue grill we have when we entertain guests.

   I graduated from high school in 1964, making this year the 50^th class reunion. As with previous reunions, I did not attend. In the past, it was difficult to go because of work and family obligations. It is a long way to New Jersey. You know all the excuses as well as I do. This year though, now being retired, would have provided me with the time and opportunity, but I opted to stay home. If I didn't go to previous reunions, why go now?

   Being from a crowded northern Jersey community, the class was rather large, well into the 600-675 student range if I remember correctly. With a class that large it was difficult to know everyone. We all, or at least most of us, had our circle of friends back then. And then came graduation , college and stepping out into real life. The high school days quickly became a distant memory, except for the day Jerry Nardelly's sports car burst into flames in the student parking lot. Forgot to put out that cigarette didn't you Jerry 

   Back in high school, I was pretty active in school activities and saw myself as popular with my friends. But was that popularity all a 'myth of self?' Was I pretending to be someone I really was not?

   Several who organized the reunion have been posting pictures in a “reunion album”. Most attending the reunion looked ….......looked exactly like the reflection staring back at me in the mirror, people in their late 60's, gray hair, no hair, wrinkles, glasses and dressed to make themselves look much younger. Looking at the pictures I didn't recognize any one. Would they have recognized me? Perhaps that was the reason I didn't attend!

   I think there are two parts of knowing who you are, of knowing 'self'. First, there is the image that you have of yourself, the one you see in the mirror every day. But  there is the other part, that being how others, those you interact with each day, see you.

   In your mind you may see yourself as kind, gentle, patient, understanding, helpful, expressing concern for others, when in reality your behavior and daily activities express a much different message.

   For example. you may think of yourself as being an advocate for the poor, the homeless, those who struggle in life, when in reality what you do is not really for those you think you are helping, but only as a means to reinforce your own 'self.' Golly! I am a really wonderful person.

   To get a true and more accurate picture of who you are, of 'self', perhaps you have to look beyond the mirror. Yes, the shirt and tie may look great together, but all that really says is  you can match colors well. Will a nice shirt and tie have any effect on how you interact with the people around you? It says very little about 'character.'

   Perhaps we are not really who we think we are. In our own mind are we just a 'myth?'

An American dream.........

   As I take a few minutes to write this week's post  I am about ready to return home from a trip to the 'heart' of the American Revolution..... Williamsburg, Jamestown and Yorktown in Virginia. I know Boston factors into the mix too, but for me there is something very special about this area. Where else can you walk and talk with George Washington, Patrick Henry, Thomas Jefferson and other great American patriots to get a real sense of what was taking place in the late 1700's. The area and activities in Williamsburg are filled with history and if you are really quiet, you can almost hear some of the original discussions and debates.
   Walking up and down Duke of Gloucester Street, it is easy for one, or at least me, to be transported back in time. People dressed in original garb race back and forth between the shops and homes. They almost seem real. Life in early America must have been very difficult for many who ventured into the new world. But with the dreams and hopes of "life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness" for future generations, the reward for living through difficult times far out-weighed the risks.( In one of the final edits, Thomas Jefferson replaced the word 'property' with 'happiness'.)
   I especially like to listen to those who assume the roles of many of this country's 'founding fathers' as they discuss the times and events leading up to and following  the fight for independence. Those who assume these character roles have studied and done their homework as they get to know each person. I can only assume it has changed their lives as well and given a deeper understanding of who these patriots were and what they believed.
    But as you listen to them speak and if you close your eyes and open your mind, you might have a difficult time separating the issues and concerns in 1773 from those in 2014. Regardless of who you listen to or what they believed, the concern and message was the same. They wanted  to create a "government, granted by the people and for the people......."a government  that allowed for open debate and discussion.
   It is true that in those early years there were many living in the new world who were not represented, nor would they be for many years, the Africans, women, non-land owners to mention a few. But those who helped build this new country knew they were not creating a nation for themselves. Most would not live long enough to see the successes and failures of this 'grand democracy'. They knew they were building a nation and a government for the future, one that would be able to grow and adjust as the times and needs of society changed. They knew that kings or queens, dictators or tyrants would not serve the future well. History had proven that. No one would ever be free when being ruled by a dictator or tyrant and even today one only needs to look around the world  to understand their foresight and wisdom.
   These times were not easy for anyone. But as you listen to those who assume the characters and the roles and, if they are to be believed, you cannot overlook the fact that these great men and leaders all had times of personal struggle as they searched within themselves to do what was best for the people of this new nation.
  The car is packed and it's time to head back home. This is my fourth or fifth trip to the Williamsburg area and there is always something new to see and learn. We'll be back in the Spring to see more, to learn more.
   Regardless of where you visit in the Historic Triangle, or how many times you visit, there are always reminders of where we, as a nation, have been and maybe where we should be headed.
   As we dined with some friends on the final evening at what may become one of our favorite restaurants. we noticed  the walls were covered with famous quotes and pictures.  As I took my seat and looked at the wall across from me I could not help but notice this quote and wondered if this could be the new American Dream? 

                                   "Resolve to be tender with the young,
                                    compassionate with the old.
                                    sympathetic with the striving
                                    and tolerant of the weak and the strong.
                                    Sometime in life we will have been all of these."
                                                                                 Anonymous